Eleventh Day Blues

Not a great day today. I'd been feeling a bit rough most of the day and then I go for a code review (of my project code) and I feel worse and worse and I tell them I feel a bit iffy but I think it will go away so I don't ask to stop, but it gets worse and then one of the guys reviewing gets all sarcastic at me. And so then I'm sitting on the floor feeling like I'm going to have a fit (I'm epileptic) and also panicking because I think I'm going to have a fit and he has the audacity to still be a wanker even after I've told him I feel like I'm going to have a fit *and* I'm having a panic attack. Then he storms out! And tells my co-worker something along the lines of "Kate didn't look very happy" and didn't even ask me how I was when I made it back to the office. Now, though I *am* a needy person, I don't think it's unfair of me to expect someone to say "Are you ok?" when he's seen me in that state? Maybe I'm too quick to judge, just because I'm not a heartless git doesn't mean everyone else isn't, right? And to think yesterday I was planning on retracting any rude statements I'd made because I do dislike putting bad vibes out into the world, karma and all that jazz. But I'm sorry it just bugs me and seeing as I only write in my diary once a year or so, you guys are going to have to put up with the rants! I just don't understand how someone can be so completely fucking unfeeling. Whatever. Rant partially over.

Apart from that not much else happened today. I continued planning the heroine's first kiss with her hero (not one *the* heroes) which is fun 'cos you get to plan all romantic type stuff :D I decided against it being her first and only love, life doesn't happen like that, I mean life doesn't much happen like it does in the book, mythical creatures and stuff, but some things ought to correspond to "real life" having said that - she's still going to get a whopper of a romantic kiss 'cos hey, it's a story and I can do what I like :P Funfunfun.